Decade in review

[lumy12]

Inspired by tartanshell and jedinemo, I'm going to review my decade too. They did Decembers, I'm gonna do Januarys since it's January now. Disclaimer: mine won't be nearly as interesting as theirs. I had to dig out my old journals to refresh my memory on the old stuff... and had to wade through a lot of angst because in general, I hate January. (Sorry, January, you're just a big letdown after December!) Here goes:

January, 2000. I start off the millennium with a bang -- in Disneyland! With K, her sister, her brother + brother's fiancee (this is before she turned psycho, or perhaps, she hid her psychosis well). I find it interesting to note that I jotted down inside jokes and other things of note when I got home, and upon re-reading them now, I can recall only a couple of them from my memory. "The last pee of the millennium" = <333!

That was my last trip to Disneyland. A couple weeks after that, I went to Las Vegas with my brother, and that would be his last trip to Vegas. But not mine!

I have two cats, Pantera and Bailey. I got them when I split with my ex a few years earlier. (I wish I'd taken all 4 because he gets rid of his 2 and has dogs instead with the old wretched hobag he left me for.)

In a couple months, my newfound baseball obsession will lead me to meet Aaron, and I will leave my old job and start a new one. All that will happen within 3 days of each other.

January, 2001. I've been dating Aaron (long distance) for 4 months. I'm dreading March because I had made a "no sex for 6 months" rule and I'm afraid at the 6 month mark he'll be like OKAY WOMAN WE'RE DOING IT NOW I'VE WAITED LONG ENOUGH. (That didn't happen.) Things are good with us for most of the year, until 9/11 happens and other things get thrown into motion which result in me becoming a homewrecker.

The Diamondbacks will win the World Series this year, but I won't be able to enjoy it as properly as I should with all the drama going on, and I'll realize later that I resent Aaron for "making" me miss Game 7.

I will get a promotion, to the job I currently have. ...yes, it's been that long.

January, 2002. Aaron and I have been broken up for a couple months, and I'm sneaking around with the married cowboy. Cowboy told me he'd leave his wife after the holidays, he didn't want to ruin things for his little boy. I understand this and agree with it. But it's January now and I'm impatient. I will eventually, after much agonizing and self-hatred, realize that he never intended to leave his wife, and also that his life is a never-ending string of catastrophes and drama that I want no part of.

Aaron and I will become friends again after only a couple months of not speaking to each other.

A huge wildfire will threaten my family's home in the mountains, and I'll regret not having gone up there in ages. I will start going up there every summer.

I will finally leave my second job at the movie theatre because my boss quits, and it's a time of transition as Regal Cinemas just bought us out. It feels like the right time to cut ties. I think that the new person who comes in won't want to deal with my infrequent hours, and I won't have the heart to learn all the new stuff I need to learn to do the same job in the changeover. [I might have stayed if I'd realized the new boss would be an old flame!]

I will become obsessed with buying a house and plan on doing so next year.

January, 2003. Next month I will put Oliver, a sorta-my cat, to sleep and be brokenhearted about it for a while. Then when I try to adopt another kitty, I'll be told I can't because my apartment complex only allows one (I still have 2). More motivation to get the house so I can have as many kitties as I want! (I will get Anakin and Snickers in July; they'll be born in June this year)

I am going to church every week and am active in a singles group. This will make me happy for a while, until I grow tired of trying to fit in and never measuring up. I'm also tired of all my friends getting married and having babies and leaving me behind.

I will buy a house in June and think I'll never want for anything again, now that I have this.

I will contemplate suicide for the last time at the end of the year, and this time I'll go to a doctor to get pills to stop that, because deep down I know that's not really what I want to do.

January, 2004. Aaron and I got back together last month. He's actually okay with the "no sex" thing, and I'm okay with the "no marriage" thing. I'm obsessed with clothes shopping. This has something to do with turning 30.

I will turn 30 and not even angst about it because I spent the half a year leading up to it doing all the angsting :)

Towards the end of the year, I will try out this thing called LiveJournal :) My friend havergal13 seems to like it, so why not? (though he'll abandon it in another... 4ish years)

January, 2005. I'm worried that I'm too boring for Aaron.

When RotS comes out, I should worry that I'm too fangirly, but I get too caught up in my obsession to care. I will have all these new online friends from these things called LJ communities, and I will re-discover RP through Harry Potter and Star Wars.

I will get a spiffy new computer, only it never really works right and no one who looks at it can tell me any good reason why. Still, it'll be better than what I had, and I'll get high speed internet AND an iPod mini! (which I still use, lol it's a dinosaur)

My brother will move in with me while he house-hunts, and he won't have to hunt far when the house next door goes up for sale! He will be annoyed with me when I add another cat to the household - little Gryffin, a 3-month-old kitten.

January, 2006. I'm less obsessed with Star Wars itself now, but very obsessed with the LJ fandom aspect of it. Especially omg_lightsaber where I've just picked up my second character. I list all my LJs in my journal here along with passwords, as if someone is going to come across this upon my death and take care of telling everyone for me? Silly me.

This year I will discover that not only do I enjoy reading fanfiction, but I can write it too.

I will find that there is this thing called "asexuality" and that it seems to fit me pretty closely (though later I'll realize it doesn't fit me PERFECTLY, to my dismay. How much simpler if I could just have a LABEL!)

Aaron and I will have the most mutual break-up ever in March, and will very easily remain friends this time because that's pretty much all we've been for a good portion of this "relationship."

I will buy a laptop this summer, mere months after saying "I'll never have a laptop!"

I will fill up my journal with RP things and rough drafts of fic and lament every once in a while that I should write about real life, then carry on with the RP and the fic anyway. It's not JUST because I was so into fandom; it's because LJ satisfies my need to write.

I will lose my beloved Bailey kitty to lymphoma in November.

January, 2007. My parents are getting divorced. It shouldn't come as a shock, but it does. I listen to "Mad World" on repeat and I angst about this but mostly about other online things. Things I no longer care about. Things that seem so petty in retrospect.

I will meet 2 kittens this summer who will get me started on feeding strays ♥

I will go to England in September and enjoy myself very much and hope that someday I can go baaaaaaaaaaaaack ♥ Thank you for a great trip, elledwen & bottled_void!

January, 2008. I make the most emo New Year's resolutions ever. I'm not sure what prompted it but I can see I was crying when I wrote them. I'm pretty much pissed off at everyone and everything.

I will find plutoix in October and all will be well in the land of RP again.

There's not much of note this year; too much lending of money means no trips (other than to the mountains) or special purchases, but with the recession I feel lucky to have what I have (specifically, A JOB).

January, 2009. I say goodbye to my beloved old movie theatre, not realizing that its doors will close forever 2 months after my visit. I wonder what the heck is going on with my left pinkie finger because all of a sudden I can't type with it. I learn that my beloved Pantera kitty has cancer in her mouth, and I will put her to sleep in March.

I will get my finger surgically corrected in May, along with my old wrist issues and some other finger issues, and spend a good portion of my summer off-line while recovering, during which I'll read a lot and watch movies and annoy gizzi1213 with my one-handed emails :)

I will of course become smitten with Dr. Hottie, but that's just a fantasy... for a brief while I'll contemplate dating a therapist who shows interest, but when he makes no move I'll give up easily and go back to my spinster-ly ways; it wouldn't have worked out anyway.

January, 2010. I've weaned myself completely off my anti-depressants with no ill effects, though I've found that I cry more easily than I used to, and very recently have been more prone to rage. Hopefully I can channel that into working out or cleaning the house so I don't bitch at you guys all the time!

I'm well on my way to being a Crazy Cat Lady with 3 "my" cats, 2 mostly-my-cats, 2 sorta-my-cats, and who knows how many not-my-cats (I've seen 2 new ones just this week!).


Now I'm gonna go watch Julie & Julia again and wish I were better at cooking ♥

Comments

[gizzi1213.livejournal.com]

Ah, Schnookums, you could NEVER annoy me, one-handed emails or not!!! Now, not acknowledging how many cats you really have is another matter! ;-)

**makes mental note to quiz you on this married Cowboy person!**

[lumy12.livejournal.com]

Never say never, Shnook-shnook! <3

I'm sure I've mentioned him before. He was just another asshole!

[darkp-hawk.livejournal.com]

You make plutoix sound like some kind of gateway drug. :O

[lumy12.livejournal.com]

*snort* If it's a drug, YOU got way more addicted than I. 8 characters!

[darkp-hawk.livejournal.com]

Well, yes. I do have 8 characters.

...Someone has to keep the female population up on the ship!

[tartanshell.livejournal.com]

Wow, you've done a lot in ten years! Congratulations on weaning yourself off anti-depressants. I hope you won't be back to the sort of place where you need them ever again, because that sort of place is..."not fun" would be putting it lightly. ♥ And if you do need to bitch, what are all of your friends here for, if not to bitch to us when you need to?

*hugs* I'm very glad to know you, so, I'm selfishly grateful you found LJ and got into fandom and everything!

[lumy12.livejournal.com]

It doesn't seem like I've done a lot, but I suppose when it's all laid out like that...? Heh. I feel like I have a stronger... er... mental foundation now, for lack of a better term? I can't imagine needing them again but never say never.

*hugs back* Right back atcha, babe! You got more out of this fandom stuff than I did, though ♥

[lumy12.livejournal.com]

It had to be '06, because you made my dress for me in '05. You had already sold your house and were traveling around on the money you made from that, iirc. I didn't mention meeting the other LJers I know in person either so don't feel bad :) I only mentioned the Englanders cuz that trip was a HUGE THING for me. (I don't think they even read my LJ anymore really? I dunno, if they do they hardly ever comment)

The pills worked for me, though. I just didn't want to be on them for the rest of my life. You could probably stand to take some for a while to calm you down :P

[caffeinatedkate.livejournal.com]

Interesting, you've had a few good changes in ten years.

I will buy a house in June and think I'll never want for anything again, now that I have this.
I hope you appreciate living in a country where property prices are low enough to be able to do that. :p

I'm less obsessed with Star Wars itself now, but very obsessed with the LJ fandom aspect of it.

This year I will discover that not only do I enjoy reading fanfiction, but I can write it too.
So, was this also the year you discovered your peculiar taste in ships?

I will find that there is this thing called "asexuality" and that it seems to fit me pretty closely (though later I'll realize it doesn't fit me PERFECTLY, to my dismay. How much simpler if I could just have a LABEL!)
If it makes you feel better, you're less complicated than I am. You've only got a mixture of straight and asexual, right? I've got some lesbian in there as well.

I'm well on my way to being a Crazy Cat Lady with 3 "my" cats, 2 mostly-my-cats, 2 sorta-my-cats.
Oh, I've been meaning to ask, do the mostly-your-cats have names?

[lumy12.livejournal.com]

I bought my house at the right time! A couple years later the prices went waaaaaaaaaay up. (my poor brother had to deal with that)

Yes, I discovered slash and the GLORIOUS Palpakin pairing at the end of 2005. Actually, true story: I joined a A/O community before realizing what it was and was thoroughly grossed out. Ha! Couldn't hit the "unjoin" button fast enough. And that was before I knew I'd come to hate them. Ah, the good old days!

If there's any lesbian in me on the Kinsey scale, it's very minimal. I wouldn't factor it into the equation, no.

And yes they do, Sangha and Kumal, after the two tiger brothers in "Two Brothers" :) No one can remember those names though except me. My brother refers to them as the fat one and the scaredy one.

[laariii.livejournal.com]

Hey, this has inspired me. I might write one of these myself Lol.

I can understand the church group thing. I've never had much luck with those either - never feel like i fit in. I'm still part of one but only because i have found 2 friends that i really trust. Most of the other people i can do without- especially the blond bitches. As much as i love my religion some of its followers are real douchbags.

[lumy12.livejournal.com]

You should! It's kinda fun!

The people in my group were nice... maybe TOO nice? Like, I didn't feel anywhere near as wholesome and pure as them? The main problem I ended up having with my Bible study group was the air of superiority they seemed to feel with regard to the masses. I related more to those masses than to the group, and I was a bit put off by their attitudes. One day I just said screw it, I don't need this, I can read the Bible on my own.

Yeahhhhhh I did for a little while but quickly fell out of that habit!

[laariii.livejournal.com]

Yeh, I dislike people who feel all superior. They forget that Jesus said to the pharasees that the prostitutes and tax collectors would make it into heaven before them.

My 2 friends are not like that at all though.Probably because both of them have had less than perfect lives.
I go to church not because i think i am great and wonderful but because i know that i am not! I need something to keep me in line LOL.

[lumy12.livejournal.com]

Hehe, that's one thing I remember from more than one sermon - that people should welcome the... I forget what term they used... something ragamuffin-like. If people don't want them in their church, well... where else SHOULD they be? Church is the best place for them!

I liked that guy. He didn't strike me as superior.

[nelliedrum.livejournal.com]

That was very interesting! It's weird to think of how long I've known you! (reading your rants for 5 years now!)
I stopped my anti-deppresants and sleeping pills cold turkey about 2 months ago when I got pregnant.
Well, as you may know, I'm not pregnant anymore. But I've decided not to take anymore pills. It's a great feeling isn't it??
Except, like you, I have outbursts of crying and RAGE. Serious ANGER. It's awful! But I think that was also the pregnancy hormones. Things are getting much better!

[lumy12.livejournal.com]

Yeah I've watched you grow up and get married! :P

Yes of course I know :( I'm glad you're feeling a little better now... (did you get my comment on your last post?)

Quitting cold turkey isn't ideal but you had no choice. Now I suppose you're staying off them?

[nelliedrum.livejournal.com]

Yes, I got your comment the day of my surgery and it made me feel better!
I actually did really well! It all went very quickly, they put me down and I just slept for a few hours, then I woke up and it was time to go! The hardest part was the recovery. UGH. Those first 5 days afterwards were AWFUL! I've never been in so much pain. But I'm okay now! I went to the doctor today for my post-op and everything is fine! :)

[lumy12.livejournal.com]

Oh yay!

But ugh, they obviously didn't give you very good pain meds! At least it's over now ♥