CYOA Page 84
Sep. 14th, 2013 01:30 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lumy12"Lucky for you, Ellie ain't as cynical as I am," Joel says as he helps Danny to his feet. "We'll take you home."
"Thanks, man, I--"
"But the second you start turnin'? That's it. I reckon you won't know the difference anyhow since your brain'll be gone by then."
"Joel," you chide him quietly.
But Danny doesn't seem upset or offended. "I understand. Thank you."
"You can ride with me," Joel tells him.
"No!" you protest. "He should ride with me!"
Joel shakes his head. "No way. Too dangerous."
"Exactly! He can't hurt me, but he can hurt you."
"He can still kill ya."
"Not if we catch it early enough." You look at Danny sadly. "I'll know it, when it's too late for you... I'll know it before you even get to the point where you want to attack me. Even if you can still talk... if you still... if you're you... I guess we can just stop right there. Right, Joel? Stop and wait until... or, maybe just do it then..."
Joel frowns. "I still don't like it."
Danny holds his hands up in a supplicating gesture. "However you guys wanna do it. I'm grateful."
"Come on, we're wasting time! Danny, wait here--" And you take off running for your horse.
Joel chases you, and tries to argue with you some more while you're running, but it's hard to argue and run at the same time, so he doesn't get very far. Once the two of you are atop your respective horses, catching your breath, the argument resumes. You finally win, placating him with a promise to ride slightly ahead so he can keep an eye on Danny the whole time, and if Danny so much as scratches an itch, Joel can shoot him if he interprets it as a threatening gesture. Joel points out that he's not going to shoot the guy with you sitting right in front of him, but he does agree to let him ride with you.
Joel also insists on sticking to the highway, even in the places where it's a slightly longer route, because he's worried about visibility in the more country-like areas and you're going to be riding all night. You feel like your flashlights would be good enough to light your path either way, but Joel insists (and you do let him have his way some of the time).
It's a pretty uncomfortable stretch of the trip, the next few hours... the rest of the day. You try to engage Danny in conversation, but he only gives polite responses (you get a distinct I'd-rather-stay-lost-in-thought vibe off him), so you lapse into tense silence. You wish it were Joel sitting behind you. Then I could just lean back and take a nap tonight! You would offer to return the favor for Joel, with him perhaps leaning forward on you, because if he were in front and leaned back... you'd either topple off or wouldn't be able to see shit? -but yeah right, like he would just casually go to sleep that way, Outside. You feel guilty, thinking about something trivial like sleep, when Danny...
You feel guilty thinking about anything, really. His fate should have been yours. Why do you get to be the lucky one?
It's also uncomfortable feeling Joel's eyes on you constantly. You know he's mainly watching Danny, not you, but it's like you can feel his scrutinizing gaze boring right through your passenger or something. When you break at dusk and again after it's dark, the poor horses think you're going to camp for the night. You feel bad pushing them so hard -- at a more grueling pace than before, too -- but you don't have time to rest!
Until Joel declares a mandatory break for around an hour, maybe two (not like you can tell time out here). He feels like the horses need it. You think Joel needs it -- that he should take a nap -- but he scoffs at that.
Since you're taking a longer break, you can now eat a real dinner. You know Danny must be pretty hungry by now, but he refuses to eat anything. Even a lousy piece of fruit, for fuck's sake. You've stopped at a rest area along the highway, and they have picnic tables there, but Danny hobbles away from your setup and plants himself in front of a nearby tree. You walk over to him and try to get him to take an apple from you. "We have plenty of food, especially since the trip was shorter than expected," you insist.
"Thank you, Ellie, but it's wasted on me," Danny says flatly.
He's right, of course... from a certain point of view. You sigh. "It's not a waste if you're hungry and it satisfies the hunger. ...How are you feeling? Physically, I mean."
He shrugs. "Don't know what to tell ya. It doesn't... feel like I'm about to turn into a monster, if that's what you're wondering."
"No, I... didn't mean to be insensitive..."
"I know. And you weren't. ...You should go back and sit with Joel."
"You don't have to sit by yourself."
He looks up at you. "It's easier, being alone. If you don't mind."
You don't understand why some people want to be alone at times when they most need a friend. But, you also don't have to understand it. "Okay. If you take this and start eating it, I'll leave you alone."
He finally takes the apple from you -- yes! -- and with a crooked smile to boot. He takes a bite...
...and you plop down, right there in front of him, off to the side a little. Not close enough that Joel will freak out. That way, your flashlight isn't shining right in his face, but you can still kinda see him. "I know, I know... I said I would leave you alone. But I didn't say when. I just... wanted to ask you something first."
He swallows. "Shoot."
Hey, Joel says that sometimes... "You said that... Lady took off yesterday? After your... encounter with infected?"
"Yep."
"But you also said that... it was this morning when you fucked up your ankle. And that... that it happened at that time -- with the infected."
Danny snorts. "You don't miss a thing, do ya."
"I'm not... mad or anything, I just was wondering... you got infected yesterday. Right? Not today."
"You are correct."
You know Joel thought he was lying, but if he had pieced that together, he probably would have made a stronger case for shooting him back where you met up. It didn't occur to you until you replayed the conversation in your head while you were riding. "So, you know that..." ...is there a delicate way to put this?... "...that there's no way in hell you're going to make it home in time. You know that, right?"
His eyes fill with tears; it's the most emotion he's shown yet. "You think I'm in denial."
You're not sure what to do about the tears. It's awkward enough when girls cry, but you're really not used to seeing grown men cry. Little kids are easy -- just give them a hug and then distract them from whatever hurt them and they'll be fine. But you don't think Danny really wants a hug right now. He's probably close to telling you to fuck off, in fact. "Well... are you in denial?" you ask anyway.
"Maybe. But the way I see it... how does anyone know for sure that people always turn in two days or less? What if... maybe the strain has mutated over the years, maybe things aren't always... we just don't know, do we. Not like there are news reports with updates." He sniffles and takes another bite of apple.
You think about that. And you can't not think about Riley... "You still have hope," you conclude, your voice barely above a whisper as you start feeling that choking thing in your throat...
"It's dwindling, but... yeah."
"How bad is it? How far has it..."
"Honestly... I'm afraid to look. I'm afraid to look!" ...And now he loses it.
Oh, fuck it -- you lean over and hug him. The apple falls in the dirt when he hugs you back.
"Ellie!" yells Joel.
You turn and shoot him a cease-and-desist look, but you're not sure it comes through when you're squinting into the beam of his flashlight. "We're fine, Joel!" you yell back -- too late, as he's already right in front of you. "Go... I'll be there in a minute, okay?" you plead with him.
You're a little surprised that he listens to you and leaves... he must've surmised that you're not getting attacked right now. He's keeping his light on you, though. Poor Danny... you feel his body shake with repressed sobs. At least... you think that's why he's shaking... a sliver of fear lodges in your stomach. His face is buried in your shoulder. He's not trying to bite me, though...
"Sorry," Danny mumbles, sitting back and letting his arms fall slack at his sides.
"It's okay. You can cry, you know. Anyone would."
He just shakes his head and swipes at his eyes.
You wish Joel would cool it with the light. You get it, but still. "So um... I was thinking... -And then I swear I'll leave you alone!"
"Shoot," he says again -- sounding even more like Joel than he did the first time.
How fucking grateful are you that it's Danny who's infected and not Joel?! Although you feel a little guilty, thinking about that now. Focus on Danny! "Um, I thought maybe... just in case you don't make it back, in time... I have a little notepad and a pencil in my backpack. Maybe you wanna use this time to... you know. Say goodbye a different way?"
"That... wow. That would be great, Ellie -- thank you. Thank you." He smiles at you through the tears.
That grateful smile makes you feel so good -- like you're finally doing something for him that actually matters. Something that will make a difference. You scramble to find the paper and pencil in your backpack. "Here... sorry, you'll have to write kind of small. And by flashlight, which is kind of annoying..."
"Thank you," he whispers yet again. "Thank you so much."
You pick up the discarded apple and rotate it in your hand, looking for spots where maybe it didn't hit dirt, or where the dirt can be easily dusted off the skin (you hate wasting food).
"Sorry about that," says Danny.
"It's fine! You know what? The ants can have it." You toss it aside. "Just yell if you change your mind and want company, okay? I'll be right over there."
He nods, thanks you one more time, and stares at the notepad intently. The words are probably churning in his brain already.
You return to your picnic table and sit across from Joel, mentally preparing to be scolded.
Continue to page 149.
Carlos
Date: 2020-10-22 04:50 am (UTC)Do you know if some people still reading this?
Re: Carlos
Date: 2020-10-22 01:26 pm (UTC)The one who printed it says he's still reading... and a few weeks ago I got a comment from someone who wanted to cheer up after playing part 2 so she read one story. That's it!